Tip 1: Trust in your children
- It is extremely important that you believe in your children’s potential. Always saying: “You can do it, you are capable, you will succeed, you will achieve success in life” and so on is just not enough. You need to truly believe in this in your heart. Without this, the children will feel that your words are false.
We communicate a lot with the parents, especially when recruiting students, and often we face the fact that many fathers and mothers do not believe in their children, they don’t consider them smart because they performed poorly at school. This feeling of insecurity is transmitted to children, it forms the basis of the fears that they feel when studying certain disciplines. Fear blocks cognitive abilities, impairing a person’s ability to study. This leads to more stress, more fear, more insecurity. And so on, creating a vicious circle.
Thus, I would like to emphasize the paramount importance of this principle - believe in the capabilities of your children, believe in their potential and pass this confidence on to them.
Children now are undergoing a very difficult transformational period, they receive a lot of new knowledge and skills, and all this makes the central nervous system and mind very sensitive and fragile. I ask you to always let them know that you are nearby, that you will support them in any situation and will not judge them.
Certainly, this does not mean tolerating anything and everything, allowing them to do anything - absolutely not, the rules should remain. But the child should see your love first of all, and even if they are not permitted to do something, it is only because you care about their well-being, about their future.
Tip 2: Let your child talk
- Try to talk to your children as much as possible. Talk to them while having lunch, breakfast, dinner, talk on various topics - you can discuss news, a movie, a book, anything.
Do not suppress their point of view, do not cut them off, give them the opportunity to speak out. For example, our School instructors require students to reason, argue, substantiate their point of view, and it is very important that at home the students find themselves in an environment where the expression of their opinion, their own point of view and argumentation are encouraged. Every time, ask your child to justify their opinion (no matter what topic), and if it seems to you that the argument is rather weak and not convincing, point this out delicately, in a friendly manner, calmly and politely.
This will develop self-confidence and logical thinking in children.
Tip 3: Read with your children
- Try to read with your children. Pick up a book of short stories, maybe some poetry, and read it out loud. Either you or your child can read it, or you can take turns reading to each other. You can read with the whole family - sit down together, and let everyone read a chapter, a page, a paragraph...
After reading a story or a poem, you can discuss it - let everyone express their opinion, show what they understood from it, what they missed, what the author’s main idea is, list three things they liked and three things they didn’t, what they agree and disagree with, and so on. It also promotes thinking processes.
Tip 4: Engage in homework
- I highly recommend actively helping children do their homework. By saying this I do not mean doing the homework for the child. It is about listening to children, learning what they do, how they do it, and why they do the task the way they do it and not otherwise. Let the children tell you what they accomplished, show you a presentation they prepared, or read an essay they wrote. Discuss the tasks they completed with them, ask questions...
This will help children better perform in their homework, be more willing to do it, knowing that later they will be able to discuss it with their parents, realizing that you are waiting for this, that you are interested in discussing it. This is extremely motivating.
Tip 5: Play with your kids
- I would also recommend playing with children. You can play Scrabble, Word Chain or a board game. You can even go further and organize a home concert, enact a play, whatever! Try to involve all family members or most of them. This will give an opportunity to show your child's creative, intellectual skills, as well as allow you to become closer to each other, open up something in each other that you may not have even suspected.
Tip 6: Discuss education and the future.
Talk about your children's future careers. Let the children dream and think about who they want to be, how they see themselves in 5, 10, 15 years, let them describe in detail how they see their life. Let them say things that may be out of touch with reality, that seem completely impossible to you ... Who knows, maybe they will turn out to be right? In any case, this conversation about the future will be a good opportunity for you to talk about the importance of education. We often come across situations where people dream of professions that, for example, require the study of chemistry or math, but at the same time we do not like to study them. And this is where the opportunity arises to emphasize how important it is to study math (for example), if children want their dream of a future career to come true.
Tip 7: Learn to build relations
- Strive to encourage and teach children to build positive, constructive, mutually respectful relationships with other people. Discuss their relationships with classmates, former classmates, neighbors, and generally with those people who make up their social circle. Do not judge, do not criticize anyone, just try to give the child the skills to properly build relationships with other people. This is the skill that you have mastered during your life experience, while they still have not. The contribution of parents is especially valuable here.
Tip 8: Create a cult of knowledge at home
- If you demand from your children to study diligently, while simultaneously telling someone else that “all these diplomas are useless, one can achieve something without studying,” etc., there is a gap between your requirements and your beliefs. Naturally, this gap will affect the performance of your children. If you want your child to be successful, such contradictions should be avoided. Ensure consistency and congruity, both in your demands and in your views, your reasoning about life, about other people and their success.
Tip 9: Create an environment conducive to learning
- I understand that living conditions do not always allow this, but it is highly desirable that children have their own workplace with good lighting and ventilation, that they have time specifically dedicated to studying when they are not disturbed by either parents or younger siblings, pets and so on.
It is very important that the desk and chair height be appropriate. The hips and knees should be bent at a 90-degree angle, just as the elbows, when the child puts his/her hands on the desk. Please pay attention to this, because children and teenagers often sit in an uncomfortable position, which leads to impaired blood circulation and, as a result, decreased cognitive abilities and increased fatigue.
Tip 10: Give your teen privacy
- It is very important that teenagers are allowed, at times, to spend time alone. This is the age when children begin to instinctively, subconsciously strive to "leave the nest." They try to keep a certain distance from their parents in order to feel like independent individuals. This is important for their future.
Understand their choices, but be aware of the abuse of such solitary practices, don’t allow their solitude to harm family communication.
Tip 11: Have creative materials at home
- Research shows that having books, paper crafting materials, sketchbooks, paints, pencils, felt-tip pens, and various other materials for crafts at home contributes to the intellectual, creative and spiritual development of an individual, more successful studies, and a more successful career in the future.
If you can afford it, have such things at home. Perhaps your child will not use them immediately, but sooner or later they will pick them up, look through them, try them and, perhaps, reveal a yet unsuspected talent.
Tip 12: Don’t boss your children around
- Situations can be different, often the family lives in a small apartment and, as a result, the child often hears something like: "Don't stand here, don't sit here, go there, sit there." Please try not to do this, don't boss your children around, because it suppresses their personality and self-confidence. It is necessary that children develop a sense of control over space, rather than control of space for them. This is important for developing self-confidence and academic success.
Tip 13: Praise
- Be sure to praise your children if they draw, take pictures, make paper crafts, and so on. Discuss their works, paintings, hang the them on the wall, show them to friends and acquaintances.
Remember: you won't spoil a child with praise. Believe me - there are a lot of situations in life when children begin to doubt themselves, and if you praise them now and again, it definitely won’t hurt. But at the same time, do not forget that, first and foremost, you praise them for their work and effort.